Sunday, 24 March 2013

It's the end of the world

I could use this space in the void of the Internet to make a point, I could stand up for the rights of the oppressed, I could hold a huge organisation to account for corruption or I could use this as a platform for someone who needs to get a serious point across.

Instead I'm going to talk about the snow, also known as that white stuff which can crush an economy, bring a country to its knees and give our news program's something to talk about. It's is snowing in Britain, near the end of march. That is not meant to happen.

I promised myself that I would start to take care of my body, I would get fitter and eat heather, how am I meant to go jogging when I running in fear of sheet ice and flying reindeer? 

I wanted to try tennis. Mind you it's good news for Phillip Schofield, there are so many Dancing on Ice spin-offs that the sexy silver fox could host. For example 'Tennis on Ice,' 'Jeremy Kyle on Ice' or my personal favorite, 'OAP's falling over on ice.'

My car was mistaken for a moving ice rink, I had polar bear cubs making their home on my roof.

My mum is one of those people who freezes milk, so I think that she should turn the freezer off and put all of the food in the garden, not only will she save some money on her electricity bill, but the neighbors will also be able to see what we are going to have for dinner.

So I don't really know what I'm meant to do, and Sunday morning tv is rubbish.

I have also developed a voice which sounds like a cross between Bubbles DeVere and Professor Snape, I read this post to my brothers in that voice. 

They laughed.

1 comment:

  1. Did you put the polar bear aside for me next weekend I need a new pet? :P How about Tom and Jerry on ice it would be better than most of the reality tv programs we have today and just because I can bear Grylls on ice and now for the mandatory drink his own piss comment