My First NaNoWriMo Experience.

As the title suggests, this post is going to be thrown mercilessly at your face.

A few days ago, I made the rather wonderful decision to get of my abnormally large rear-end and meet up other with writers who are doing NaNoWriMo. I am so god-dam glad that I did, what was meant to be a one hour kick-off party turned in to a five hour meshing of minds, memories, travels and intelligence (I brought what little of the mind I had, but you can forget about the other three.)

It was clear that I am the baby of the group.

The writers that I met had so many stories to tell, and far too many to list here, there was someone who studied biology but then went to work for a chain of comic stores and an American archaeologist who travels, stories and world knowledge leave me jealous.

We talked about everything and anything, from our particular fandoms to politics and how politics in America is like a group of four year old's who don't know how to behave.

What surprised me is how far to the left our Conservative party is compared to The Republicans. In fact over in America our conservatives are closer in line to The Democrats. On that bases, our liberals are almost considered radical. 

One thing I did know and what was confirmed is that there is no middle ground in American politics, you are ether a democrat or a republican. I also learned that more and more people are choosing to vote for an independent representative.

I asked if one of our governments could move to an independent model? Sadly in today's world, it would come down to government by Murdoch, only those with the personality (and quite a lot of cash) would be able to get the main votes, it wouldn't even matter what there policies are. 

An example of this is Ancient Greece, imagine only the rich men at the head of the household making all of the decisions. It wouldn't matter who had the ideals to change the world and do good for other people, they don't have the money to pull in the crowds, no one is going to hear them shout.

Personally, I would love to see an election race between two or more independent candidates in which money is not involved, all that matters is the polices, and how they are going to serve the American people. 

Sadly, as a species, it seems like we are not ready for something so advance, we need flashing lights and Neil Patrick Harris type performance.

So it seem that the best we can hope for is that both our governments can work the way they were intended, on compromise. A wonderful example of this is the recent Syrian crises, both Cameron and Obama wanted to charge in there and the bomb the living daylight out of the Syrian people, but it was clear that most of us in America and Britain did not want anyone to go into yet another war.

Both Cameron and Obama knew that if they if they did to to war, they would have a one hell of a time trying to keep us all calm, I think we could all see that if we marched into Syria, Russia and China will go to defend their allies in the region and we could potently have world war three on our hands.

Thus it was put to a vote, over here in Britain we were the first to say no, clearly this pissed off Mitt Romney who later passed a remark saying that France was a better alloy then Britain. I think everyone laughed at that.

America had a vote too and unsurprisingly, they also said no. 

During that situation, our governments actually did their jobs, they represented the wants, needs and wishes of their people. I may hate Cameron and the conservatives but I will respect him for putting the decision forward to vote and possibly in effect persuading Obama to do the same.   

If your interested, in the last election I voted for the liberal democrats, next time around I am very likely to vote for Labour, even if I do think that Ed Miliband is a spineless twat.

You know something, NaNoWriMo is not about the novel (I'm still going to write the bloody thing,) it's about the people you meet, the lesson you learn and the stories you share. It is the people who get together under the common banner of a love writing that help make NaNoWriMo so special.

I sincerely hope I don't mess things up and that friends I make over the next month or so will hang around for a little while afterwards

Let's Talk About Lifts And Bouncing

Last Wednesday, I had to go shopping in Sainsbury's

The contents of what I brought are irrelevant but it was enough for four bags. (I can tell that you're really interested in this post.)

The Sainsbury that I often go to is a relatively new one, it has it's own muti-story car park and there is a cinema right next door. I parked on the top floor which meant that on the way down I could take the leaning travelator down to the shop floor.

I am unaware of how travelator's work in other countries, but over in England, where the sun is always shining, we have a voice that speaks to us when near the end. The voice Sainsbury's have installed is one of a 40-something year old dominatrix who tells us to 'push' our trollies off the walkway.

Unfortunately on the way back up, the return travelator wasn't working, which meant that I was left with two choices; the lift, or the stairs.

Do I look like I want to take the stairs?

When I got into the lift, I made a huge mistake, I held the doors open for a lovely lady, her shopping trolly and  flood of a loud 60-something (I'm being kind) dominatrix who is talking to a younger woman about how she 'bounced' on a trampoline for the first time since she could remember.

For the rest of us in the lift, this conversation, had no context.

We all looked at each other, while this woman kept talking about bouncing'

When the woman and a few other people bounced off the elevator and onto the first floor, I was left in with one other guy. We completed the rest of the journey in a awkward silence.

We did not bounce off the elevator.

NaNoWriMo And Sleep Deprivation

For the more perceptive of you who are reading this post in October or November of 2013, you will notice the giant bad-ass banner that is at the top of this blog.

This giant bad-ass banner is there to inform you that I am going to be attempting to do NaNoWriMo this year. I am useless at giant bad-ass things like this, so it is a bit of a surprise that this condemned blog is somehow still floating and by some divine intervention has 5171 pageviews.

Although I suspect that it's just my mum pressing refresh 5171 times, she is my biggest fan. Love ya mum.

NaNoWriMo is a yearly event that is rather simple, write a 50,000 novel in 30 days. I have tried writing before but most of my attempts ended with something that is a akin to a cow throwing up and eating it's own vomit four times in a row.

So to help me stay on track, I've made myself a few rules:

• Write at least 1667 words a day. (some clever person typed 50,000 divided by 30 into their phone.)
• Update this blog everyday with my progress.
• Get my sorry little ass off my bed and out into the big wide world, or failing that, Milton Keynes.
• Get some sleep every night.

It's almost eight in the morning and I've pulled yet another radically boring all-nighter. I need to stop going to sleep in the morning. With the way my body clock is tuned right now, I could move to Hawaii. I hear it's lovely this time of year.

In other news, later on today I have an interview with ASDA.   

I've been a very naughty boy.

I haven't blogged in while, not something I intended to do.

So in the three months I've been away from you sexy people, I've had a couple of mental ooh-la-la's and worked out that I'm in the wrong career. I'm half-way up a mountain that I don't want to climb.

Long story short, the name of this blog (needsmorework) has some meaning now, I'm unemployed.

However it's not all bad, I have noticed that I've matured and I'm pretty cool, I might suit up

There is one thing I have noticed, there are some people among us who believe that those who are unemployed are lesser human beings. You can tell who these people are a mile off. What they seem to forget is that not many people like being unemployed, I for one hate it, so I hit the ground running, in these four or weeks, I've already had three interviews and I have another one on Wednesday (look at me showing off.)

So my message is this, your job doesn't make you who you are. To be completely honest, I don't know what makes us who we are, if I did, I could make a fortune.

Instead I ask for you to do one thing, if you know someone who is a bit down on their luck, pick them up, dust them off, pat them on the shoulder, tell them that they are doing great and stand by them. I'm lucky that i got the long straw and that I have some awesome people around me. Sadly there are those who are not as fortunate as me.

So don't leave comments saying that your sorry for me because I'm fine, I've got a entire pit crew behind me. Instead, leave a comment saying how you made someones day suck less and if you are a bit down and think you're not awesome, you're wrong. I think you're legen -

Wait for it...

...dary         

I'm melting.

The weather in England right down is hotter then all the tombs in the sixth circle of hell combined.

I must apologize for the lack of posts, I got swept away with life once again. It's been a crazy few weeks, last week I was named Chief Correspondent for ShoutoutUK. I allowed myself a small victory dance when I was found out.

But before that I just popped along to a book launch, Feral Youth by Polly Courtney is so far my favorite book of the year, it is so real and so beautiful. When I found out the book was about a girl called Alesha who grew up in a South London estate, I thought that it would just be some silly little attempt by someone pretending to understand a generation that no text book can teach you, I was wrong. In this situation I don't mind being wrong.

The full article is here: http://www.shoutoutuk.org/2013/06/29/feral-youth-by-polly-courtney-what-is-really-going-on-with-young-people/

Also, I found out this morning that lovely people at the Youth Media Agency quoted me: 

http://www.youthmediaagency.org.uk/feralyouth-book-launch/

  

I've also wrote a piece on 16-17 year olds in Scotland getting the vote in the referendum, as a correspondent, I'm going to stay as neutral as possible, but then again this is my blog, I have no rules here.

I am all for lowing the voting age to 16, however this must come along with political eduction in our schools. Citizenship is not enough, it is just a lesson for ticking boxes. We have a duty to teach our children about politics and how our country is run. How can we hold our MP's to account if we don't know what they are doing? 

I also wonder if the voting age is lowered in Scotland, would 16 and 17 year olds in England get the vote as well. This article has found it's home here: http://www.shoutoutuk.org/2013/06/24/should-16-and-17-year-olds-be-given-the-vote-in-scotland/

Also I forgot to add the link from the 'I failed You' post, so here it is: http://www.shoutoutuk.org/2013/06/18/committee-room-2-the-roots-and-progress-of-bite-the-ballot/

The song that I am currently singing is 'I Want To Know What Love Is' from the original broadway cast recording of Rock of Ages.

However as I wrote that, the song changed to 'Friends of the Ood' by  Chameleon Circuit.  

Writing for myself.

I have just finished a long six hour straight article writing session for my job, now it's time to write for myself before I end up punching the screen of the laptop.

I am currently sat on the couch of my living watching The Magnificent Seven, one of the only westerns that I like while drinking coffee from my Thomas the Tank Engine cup. I have now decided that I must learn how to ride a horse.

In some of my previous posts I talked about how I was writing a novel. That has now become a radio play thing, no doubt that this will slowly morph into a film script then into a video series and back around to novel. To save some face, I decided to design one of the star-space ships that would be in the universe-galaxy thing, it is needless to say that I failed art for a reason. This picture below is the view from the front. The idea is that there is one command pod and other pods can be changed around so that the ship can perform different tasks.

However, I appear to have drawn (at least to my immature mind) a cock and balls. What does that say about me? Instead of drawing a ship of incredible speed and wonder, I draw an object of incredible speed and wonder, shame it's not a self portrait.

Today I found a random stick of ram.

Jamie Cullum and my iOS 7 review will have to wait, i'm too tired right now. Apart from that, it's been pretty uneventful.  

Realigning my moral compass

In my last post I had a bit of a moral ooh-la-la. While writing that post, I was watching Star Trek (yes, I know) and it got me thinking, the majority of my moral compass, landscape thing came from the huge collection of videotapes that I used to watch as young teenager because I didn't like going out and I was way too shy,

Couple that with being the most irritating teachers pet and having bucked teeth that are so bad they make Bugs Bunny look like a model, I was clearly not one of the cool socialaties. 

Annoyingly, my lazy eye came in when I was eighteen, where was it when I was 13? I could have dealt with everything together, then I would be sane, right up until the moment I go on a rampage and brutally murder everyone who has ever bullied me. (I wonder if this paragraph will get the CSA's attentions. I assume my next post will be from a hotel room in Hong Kong.)

But I'm going off-track. The reason that I wanted to write this post was to share with you what the characters from the different series have taught me, this is in no particular order, it's just the order that it comes to my brain.

Captain Jean-Luc Picard: It's cool to be patient, not everyone is as awesome as you, it takes time for them to think of the right reaction, and if it all goes wrong, just put your hand on your forehead, lean into it and sigh. 

Commander William T. Riker: While I'm never going to have his allure, I have picked up The Riker Maneuver, if I am ever on some kind of date and you do not understand and appreciate it's majesty, we are not meant to be together 

Captain James T. Kirk: Don't worry, it's ok to pause...

Lieutenant Tasha Yar: Kindness and compassion will make you one of the most likeable members of the crew, however this will get you killed off in season two, but you do come back as a kick-ass Romulan.

General Martok: If 'please allow me to hand you your rear end on a plate during which I will be dispensing life advice to Sisko while being loyal, battle savvy, cool, brave with just a touch of humble' had a definition, it would be this warrior. He would never lead his troops into a lost cause. I just wonder what he would have said if he was with me when I was coming of Westminster. Would he have told me to be wise and stay away or would he have lead the charge.

Captain James T. Kirk: ...in the middle...

Guinan: " I picked this up on Mangus three, that was setting number one, would anyone like to see setting number two?"

Jadzia Dax: Excuse me, I’m trying to put Worf in his place. Oh yes Benjamin.

Captain James T. Kirk: ...of sex with 75 more orions then Riker (sorry man, he just has less regulations)

Chief Miles Edward O'Brien: Not only do we share a middle name, but we are also both incredibly awesome. This legend worked his way up from the dangerous path of the red shirt to one of the most loved characters in the whole franchise. This man could shut down as wormhole while repairing the Defiant and somehow keeping DS9 from falling apart.

Commander/Captain Benjamin Sisko: If you are looking for cool, he is your man. He can take a tiny little starship and destroy an entire fleet, while playing baseball, chilling with gods and hopping over the mirror universe so he do stuff to his bridge officers that would normally be against every regulation in Starfleet.

Wesley Crusher: The only reason that 'SHUT UP WESLEY' is on this list is because I used to be just like him, annoying, bright and useless, expect I am control controlled by my puppet masters known as the CSA who will chase me to Hong Kong should I publish this article. Don't get me wrong, Wil Wheaton is awesome, it's just that I'm not as awesome as him.

I'm getting distracted, but I've slept between starting this post and writing this paragraph, and I've realised, there is no point worrying about whether I went to the protest or not, what has happened has happened, I can't change that.

But I can start to be awesome, you watch this space, this time next year I would have had a DNA and found out that I am the estranged love child of Wil Wheaton and Neil Patrick Harris. At which point I would start to embrace the side of me that loves to wear suits while hacking into the mainframe of the FBI.

I just didn’t inherit their good looks